Before I started my yoga and meditation practice I was living a life where I didn’t ever stop to think about why I was making the choices I was making, where I was going, what was going on around me, or who I really was. I lived a life where I just wanted to meet my goals at whatever cost and if anyone were to question me or try to slow me down there would be significant conflict. It got to the point where I felt lost and exhausted (and deeply depressed). I just wanted to accomplish, achieve, build, and quite frankly I was doing an below average job doing any of those things. It never occurred to me that slowing down would actually help. And I most certainly didn’t think meditation was the answer to anything in my life. I thought to do it correctly you had to basically be a monk. Not only that but I also thought it meant breathing a certain way and the pressure to breath perfectly gave me anxiety even thinking about it so I never tried it. Then I found myself desperate for a new way of living. It was the choice to start doing yoga that showed me the truth about meditation. I learned about awareness. I understood finally what it meant and how it would help...and more importantly…..that I was already equipped to do it! It all begins and ends with awareness.
“Awareness is like the sun. When it shines on things, they are transformed.” Thich Nhat Hanh
Here are some things to remember before you begin to meditate:
Awareness: Awareness is such a simple concept, but one of the hardest things to do. So, what exactly is awareness? Awareness is simply the act of objectively paying attention to an object for a long period of time. That object could be your environment (sounds, sights, smells), your body, your breath, your thoughts and emotions, the list can go on and on. It doesn’t really matter what you choose to be the object of attention. What is important is the act of awareness, the relationship between you and whatever it is that you are focusing your attention on. The idea of focusing on something for a long time is a little intimidating if it is hard for you to sit still or concentrate for a while. But there is amazing news! It is OK to have your mind wonder and this image of needing to sit still and meditate for 8 hours can be thrown out the window!
Its OK to think: We are humans with minds that think. If we stop thinking we die. The purpose of all this is not to die. So please, go ahead and have your thoughts. If you try to suppress your thoughts you will be doing more harm than good. In his book; Mindfulness for Beginners, Jon Kabat-Zinn tells us to befriend our thinking, that it's about holding your thoughts in awareness (watching them without attachment) not about kicking them to curb (an impossible act as far as I am concerned). This very idea made meditation something I could do. I have monkey mind. I jump around and go through my to do list, go over conversations from yesterday (or 10 years ago), think about work, kids, my house, etc...you name it...and I can all this in 3 seconds flat. Its is amazing really….and helpful if you are managing many things at once (which I find myself choosing to do less these days but historically speaking has been a big part of my life), but not so helpful if you are trying to slow down and live a happy and healthy life. When I found out that this was no only normal, but OK to have happen it changed my life almost over night.
Your Breath: Our breath never leaves us till while we are here and alive. It is our lifelong companion. It even speaks to us. I will often not realize how upset I am till I notice that i am breathing fast and shallow. It gives us good clues as to what is going with us emotionally and physically. We don’t have to change our breathing to meditate. Being aware of your breath and how it is naturally occurring will cause it to organically change to a more rhythmic place. You don’t have to force anything here. Watch your breath as it is and then watch how it changes. And if it doesn't change, that's OK. You are aware of your breath objectively and that is more than enough.
Types of meditation: You can mediate while doing anything. Since meditation is awareness and awareness can happen at any point, then you can even meditate while driving just by being fully aware of the sensations around you (in fact this seems like a healthy practice for everyone involved around us while behind the wheel...). I love to sit and mediate, but I found that hard at first so my first time meditating was while I did the dishes. In fact I didn't start regularly sitting and meditating on a daily basis till about a year ago. Before that point I found awareness throughout my day and maybe sat down to mediate for a few minutes every couple of days or so. A lot of people love walking meditations where they go for a walk and notice their movements and the sensations around them. Yoga is even a form of mediation. Yoga almost "forces" an environment of awareness within you. Forces might be a harsh and perhaps wrong word to use since nothing about awareness (and certainly not Yoga) should be forced, but the very foundation of yoga lies in the awareness of breath and body. Because of this you will find yourself in awareness almost by accident while doing yoga (as I did) and might it might even be a favored way for you to learn to cultivate that awareness off your mat.
Do you feel ready now?
Now that we have awareness defined and we know that we don’t have to stop our thoughts or control our breathing like a dictator, we can begin!
Posture: There are many different ways to meditate and therefore many different ways to hold your body during a meditation. They key is to be aware of where your body is...what shape it is in...what it is doing when you are meditating. If you are doing a walking meditation be aware of the rhythm of your steps and if you are carrying your body well. When doing a yoga nidra meditation (more about that in future posts, but I recommend you google this practice...it is a beautiful way to meditate) you will be lying on your mat in savasana (the corpse pose in yoga) which requires you to be fully relaxed yet very much aware of your body and mind. My preferred way to meditate is sitting in a traditional meditation pose on my yoga mat with my hands resting palms up on my knees. In this position it is important to keep my spine relaxed but erect with you chin slightly pointed down. Not only does this promote good posture throughout your day, but it allows for the energies in your body to flow freely with no blockage. Keeping yourself aware of your posture when meditating will keep you in the moment and promote awareness.
Gaze: I personally meditate with my eyes closed. I find it easier to watch and shift what thoughts arise for me. Then again, it would depend on the type of awareness you are searching for. If you are doing a walking meditation for example, do not close your eyes! But even if you are sitting still it is OK to keep your eyes open, gaze soft and set on one spot in front of you, or eyes wide open focused deliberately on an object of choice.
Interruptions: It is important that you make time for this practice when you are least likely to be disturbed. I have three kids and pets and the only time I know I will not be interrupted is when everyone (including my husband) is asleep or not home. I can’t always meditate or simply create a place of peace for myself during these times. What I have had to do is just accept that i have chosen the best time possible to meditate and if interruptions happen I will roll with them. I trust myself and my practice that I will be able to regain awareness after any interruption. There are, however, stimuli you can control...your phone and other electronics for example. Turn them off or to silent. Control what you can and just accept what you can’t.
Mindfulness in breath: When focusing on your breath during awareness be mindful of where you feel your breath the most. Maybe you feel it most as it enters your body through your nostrils and travels down your air pipe. If it is a cool day you might even feel it deeper in your chest. I live in a cold climate and in the winter I can feel my breathe settle in lungs. Maybe your sensation is in how your stomach or chest rises with each breath then slowly deflates as you exhale. I love observing this motion in my body, it reminds of the ocean and the waves. This is a wonderful practice when at work or in any stressful situation because it takes less than a minute to do and the effects from it are almost instant.
“If you want to conquer the anxiety of life, live in the moment, live in the breath.” - Amit Ray, Om Chanting and Meditation
Body Scan: Another great practice that you can do wherever you are is a body scan. I do this at the dentist actually. I start with my left big toe. I focus on it and think “1” then go to my next toe focus on it and think “2” I count each part of my body from toes to head just like that. I think about the sensation of that body part and how strong it is. It is surprising to realize how much of our body we don’t notice till we try to “feel” it. If you find a place of pain or discomfort sit with it as objectively as you can. Visualize a green light or mist around this area and nurture it. Don’t fight any sensations that you discover while doing this. Just accept them as they are.
Listening to sounds: Listening to meditation music while meditating is wonderful, but sometimes I choose not to because I want to observe the sounds that are naturally around me. I don’t choose to do this because the sounds are beautiful. I choose to do this because sometimes they are not and I want build the skill of accepting what is there without judgment. I choose to notice that they exist and I don’t attach myself to them. So if you are in a situation where you have to meditate with a dog barking, kids screaming, people talking, unpleasant traffic noise, etc...then that's not a bad thing. You can use these things in your practice.
Observing thoughts and emotions: Above I mentioned befriending your thoughts. This is important, but not to be confused with engaging with them. It is also important to remember that our thoughts are not truth. They often abstract creations that hold no place in the real world. I think of my passive thoughts as artwork created by my mind (this could be because I have a very abstract way of thinking, it might not apply to everyone). I don’t form attachments to my thoughts when I mediate. I don’t take them personally therefor I have grown to form no emotional reaction to them. Many people like to use visualizations when gently letting their thoughts go during moments of meditation and awareness. They see them popping like bubbles or flowing down a stream of water. I am a Harry Potter fan, so my visualization is taking a wand to my temple and pulling the thoughts out of my head and placing them in a bowl. I may or may not look at them later on.
Meditation is to be aware of every thought and of every feeling, never to say it is right or wrong, but just to watch it and move with it. In that watching, you begin to understand the whole movement of thought and feeling. And out of this awareness comes silence. - Jiddu Krishnamurti
In conclusion it is important to remember not love yourself throughout this process. We are not trying to be more perfect or better than we already are. We are not trying to do anything at all. We are just noticing moment to moment what unfolds around us. Cultivating awareness in our daily lives and meditation is really hard. Our brains...our egos...want to fight it off. Keep at it. I promise that if you do you will see change. Be gentle and patient with yourself.
Please feel free to share you experience with awareness on our Facebook page! We would love to hear from you!
Love and Light,
Shannon